I'm approaching the 35th anniversary of my birth next month and I don't know if I've ever really gotten to know myself. And I hate that. In my excessive self-reflection, I've realized I am a reactive person, not a proactive one like I like others to believe. Where I am, who I am is basically based upon my experiences that have happened to me.
I've never tried to do anything, ever. I've never wanted anything bad enough to try for it. I've never wanted anything bad enough to work through the fear. I've never known what I want. I've never known myself.
Quite the sobering thought, huh…
So I will take this eve of my birth as a wake up call to take a breath, put on my big girl panties and search my soul for some answers. I have a feeling they are going to be tough pills to swallow, but necessary ones. For me.
I'm scared to death. But I read somewhere that we resist the things we need the most.